Sawal: Aap apna khandaani taaruf karaye? Jawab: Main Rajasthan ke Churu zila ke ek Rajput khandaan mein 20 April 1968 ko paida hui, hamare pitaji high school mein principal the, ibtedai taleem gaon ke ek school mein hui, baad mein Churu mein ek degree college se maine BA kiya. Hanuman Garh ke ek parhay likhay khandaan mein 6 June 1990 ko hamari shadi hui. Mere shohar Madhya Pradesh mein Ratlam mein naib tehsildar the, woh hockey ke bohot achhe khiladi rahe hain aur unko usi bunyad par naukri mili thi, do saal mein apni sasural Hanuman Garh mein rahi, baad mein hum Ratlam zila ki ek tehsil mein jahan mere shohar ki mulazmat thi wahan rahne lage. Transfer ki wajah se Ajmer aur baad mein Mandasur mein chhe saal rahe, yahan do bete aur ek beti paida hui, 2000 mein mere shohar ka promotion hua aur woh tehsildar ban kar Bhopal ki ek tehsil mein chale gaye, ghar pariwar sab kuch acha tha, hum dono mein bohot mohabbat thi, achanak na jane kya hua hamare ghar ko kisi ki nazar lag gayi aur agar main ye kahun ke hedayat ki hawa lag gayi, Asma behn! Mera haal ajeeb hai, meri zindagi ka bigad mera sunorne ka zariya ban gaya. Sawal: Haan haan! Wahi main to sunna chahti hoon, Allah ne aap ki Islam ki taraf kaise rahnumai ki, zara tafseel se sunaiye? Jawab: Mere shohar ke daftar mein ek barhaman ladki clerk thi, bohot khubsurat aur active (faal) balke agar main kahun ke over active to ye baat bhi sach hogi. Iss ladki ki har ada mein, uski shakal mein, uski awaz mein, uske andaaz mein ghuroor har cheez mein bala ki kashish thi. Asma behn, mere shohar ki khata nahi, balke woh ladki waisi thi ke patthar ki moorti bhi uske samne pighal jati. Mere shohar apne ko bohot bachane ki koshish karte rahe aur sambhalne ki koshish karte rahe, magar Allah ne mard aur aurat ke rishte mein jazba rakha hai woh bach na sake aur us ladki se unko talluq ho gaya. Ab har waqt bas uski mohabbat mein gholte rahte the. Iska mujhe sofi-sad yaqeen hai ke jab tak unhone shadi nahi ki unmein jismani talluqat nahi hue, magar zahir hai ke ek jism mein do dil to hote nahi is se mohabbat ke sath unka mera taluq kam ho kar shuru hua. Woh shuru mein to bohot koshish karte rahe ke mujhe kuch pata na lage magar baat chhip na saki aur mujhe bhi pata lag gaya aur daftar mein bhi logon ke ilm mein aagaya, mujh se bhala kaise bardasht ho sakta tha inteshar rahne laga, baat bigadti gayi aur unho ne program banaya ke mujhe chhod kar us se shadi kar lein. Is ke liye unhone mujhe Hanuman Garh chhoda, May 2000 mein bachon ki chhootiyan thi. Woh Delhi gaye mujhe ye bataya ke mujhe training mein jana hai, Delhi mein Asha Sharma ko bulaya, Asha Sharma ne unke sath ek kamre mein rehne se mana kiya ke pehle hum shadi karein us ke baad ek kamre mein reh sakte hain. Unho ne do kamre shuru mein hotel mein liye, is ke baad wakeelon se mashwara kiya, ek wakeel ne mashwara diya ke qanooni garft se bachne ka sab se acha tareeqa ye hai ke aap dono musalman hokar shadi kar lein. Ye raaye unko pasand aayi mere shohar ne Asha ko bhi us ke liye tayyar kiya, shuru mein ek hafta tak to woh Islam qubool karne se mana karti rahi, magar baad mein bohot dabao dene par raazi hogayi, woh dono Jama Masjid Delhi gaye wahan ke imam Bukhari sahib ne unko musalman karne se mana kar diya. Kayi masajid mein mere shohar gaye magar koi musalman karne aur kalma padhane ke liye tayyar nahi hua. Kisi wakeel ne unhein bataya ke purani Delhi mein sarkari registered qazi hote hain, woh nikaah padhate hain, mere shohar ne unka pata maloom kiya aur purani Delhi ke qazi sahib ke paas gaye, unhone kaha pehle aap dono musalman ho kar musalman hone ka bayan karo sarkari wakeel se.Banwa kar lao. Mere shohar ne kaha aap hamein musalman bana lo, unho ne musalman karne se inkaar kar diya aur aap ke walid hazrat Maulana Kaleem Sahab ke paas jaane ko kaha, woh dono agle roz phoolat gaye to maloom hua ke Maulana Sahab Delhi gaye hue hain, ek Maulana Sahab ne in dono ko kalma parhwaya aur bataya ke musalman hone ke liye Maulana Sahab ka hona zaroori nahi hai, aap Merath ya Delhi se kisi Sarkari vakil (notary) se apne kaghazat banwalain. Merath ek Guptaji ka pata bhi bata diya unho ne Merath jaakar bayan halafi banwaya. Us ke baad qazi Sahab ne apni fees le kar in dono ka nikaah parhwa diya aur nikaah ko adalat se registered karwane ko bhi kaha. Aasha ne hamare shohar se kaha, hum jab musalman ho gaye hain to phir hamein Islam ko parhna bhi chahiye, unho ne Urdu bazaar se Hindi aur Angrezi mein Islam par kitabein khareedi aur Hindi Quran Majeed bhi liya. Unko kisi ne Maulana Sahab se milne ka mashwara diya, Okhla mein ek masjid mein talash aur koshish se un ki mulaqat bhi hogayi. Maulana ne unko apni kitab "Aap Ki Amanat Aap Ki Seva Mein" di aur samjha ya ke bilashubah apne khandaan, apne phool se bachon aur aisi nek biwi ko chhodna khud kaisi ajeeb cheez hai, magar agar aap sache dil se Islam qubool karen to asuljhi hui zindagi mein Allah ke qabze mein sab kuch hai, woh achhi zindagi ata karenge, Maulana Sahab ne yeh bhi kaha ke aap ko apni pehli biwi aur bachon balkay sab khandaan walon par dawat ka kaam karna chahiye, kam az kam dua to hidayat ki abhi se shuru kar deni chahiye. Mere shohar batate hain ke unhone Quran ki ayat parh kar yeh baat batayi ke jo bhi mard ho ya aurat achhe kaam karega shart yeh hai ke woh mumin ho to Allah taala usko achhi aur pakiza zindagi ata farmayenge. Sawal: Haan Quran Majeed ki ayat: "Man amila salihan min dhakarin aw unthawa huwa muminun, falanuhyiannahu hayatan tayyibah" uska tarjuma yeh hi hai. Aage batayiye? Jawab: Pehle zara is ayat ka tarjuma kijiye. Sawal: Jo bhi mard ho ya aurat nek amal karega shart yeh hai ke woh mumin ho hum usko zaroor pakiza zindagi ata karte hain. Jawab: Haan yehi bilkul yehi ayat hai, mere shohar kehte hain, is ayat ne meri zindagi ko roshan kiya hai, poori ayat unko yaad hai, sachi baat yeh hai "Falanuhyiannahu hayatan tayyibah" kaisi sachi baat kahi hai. Sawal: Haan to aage sunaiye ke aap ko imaan kaise mila, yeh to Aasha ke islam ka zikar aap kar rahi hain? Jawab: Haan behen! Isi se juda hai mera Islam bhi. Hua yeh ke mere shohar ko to shuru mein Islam ko parhne ka mauqa nah mila, magar Aasha ko parhne ka bohot shauq tha, jaise jaise Islam ko woh padhti gayi Islam uske andar utarta gaya, bachon ki chhitiyan khatam ho gayi mere shohar ki bhi chhitiyan khatam hui to woh Bhopal pahunch gaye, magar mujhe hunar mandir se nahi bulaya, mujh se rabta bhi bohot kam kiya, mujhe fikar hui to maine apne chhote bhai ko Bhopal bheja. Ittefaq se Aasha raat ko ghar thi, uska naya Islami naam Ayesha tha, mere bhai ne maloom kiya ke yeh ladki aapke ghar raat mein kaun hai, unho ne kaha daftar mein kaam karti hai daftari kaam ke liye bulaya hai. Mera bhai unse bohot lada, teesre roz mujhe usne phone karke bulaya, main apne pati ke saath Bhopal pahunchi, kai roz tak jhagda chalta raha, aakhir mein unhone woh kaghazat qubool Islam ke nikal kar mere samne rakh diye. Mere liye us se afsos aur sadma ki kya baat thi. Mere walid ne vakilon se mashwara kiya aur FIR karwai aur adalton mein kayi roz gaye, police aayi unko giraftar karke le gayi, kuch roz ke baad zamaanat to ho gayi magar daftar se unko moatil kar diya gaya. mere ghar waale meri mohabbat mein mere shohar ke dushman hogaye, jagah jagah se unpar muqadme chalaye, zindagi unke liye mushkil se mushkil hogayi, Ayesha is doran Islam ko parhti rahi aur woh bohat mazhabi musalman ban gayi. woh bhi suspend ho gayi, ghar reh kar usne Quran majeed parh liya aur kuch musalman aurton se rabtah kiya, woh ijtema mein jaane lagi. parda karne lagi, burqa mangwa liya, mere aur mere ghar waalon ki taraf se jab had darja ki mukhalifatein hui aur mere sasural waale bhi mere saath the, to Ayesha aur mere shohar ne mashwara se taye kiya ke humein Delhi jaakar Maulana Kaleem Sahab se mashwara karna chahiye, woh Delhi pahunchay, Maulana Sahab se Ayesha ne kaha Hazrat Alhamdulillah mujhe to Islam samajh mein aagaya hai, mere dil mein to yeh aata hai ke agar saari zindagi mujhe jail aur mushkilat mein guzarni pade aur mera eman salamat rah jaaye to marne ke baad ki zindagi mein jannat bohot sasti milegi, is liye mere dil mein aata hai ke un ki pehli biwi ne ek zindagi unke saath guzari hai aur bohat mohabbat aur khidmat ke saath guzari hai, is bechari ki kya khata hai, yeh agar us ke saath jaakar rehna chahen to mujhe koi aitraz nahi, albatta yeh dil chahta hai ke un ka eman bacha rahe, yeh un ke saath jakar rahen aur unko musalman karne ki koshish karen, agar woh musalman ho jaayen to un se nikah kar len, mujhe chahein talaaq de dein ya rakhein. is ke liye zaroori hai ke kuch waqt jamaat mein laga lein taake wahan jaakar murtad na hon. Maulana Sahab ne Ayesha ki raaye se ittefaq kiya, aur bohot shabashi di, phir mere shohar ko us par raazi kiya aur kaha aap Ayesha ki baat maan lein, aap chaalis roz jamaat mein laga aayen, aap ki zindagi ke sare masail mujhe ummeed hai ke inshaAllah zaroor hal ho jaayenge. woh tayyar ho gaye aur Maulana Sahab ne Nizamuddin se unko jamaat mein bhej diya, Gujarat mein unka waqt laga, Hyderabad ki jamaat ke saath waqt bohot acha laga, unko bohot acche khawab dikhaye gaye aur Alhamdulillah Islam unke andar utar gaya. Jamaat se waapas aaye to woh Ayesha ke yahan gaye, Ayesha ne unhein Hanuman Garh jakar baat karne ko kaha, magar un ki himmat nah hui. Ayesha khud ek achi daa'ee ban gayi thi, us ke bachpan ki kayi saheliyan us ki koshish se musalman ho chuki thi, Ayesha ne mujhe phone kiya ke aap Masood Sahab (mere shohar ka Islami naam Masood hai) se kab tak larai aur muqadma baazi karti rahengi, aap ek baar das minute ki meri baat sun lein, bas ek roz ke liye Bhopal aa jaiye, main un se alag hone ko tayyar hoon. main ne us ko shuru mein to bohot gaaliyan sunayin, magar is Allah ki bandi ne himmat na haari, baar baar phone karti rahi aur jab mein kisi tarah tayyar na hui to us ne mujh se yeh kaha ke achha phir hum apne Allah se keh kar bulayenge. Ayesha batati thi is ke baad us ne do rakaat Salah ul Hajat parhi aur Allah ke samne faryaad ki: Mere Allah! jab mein aap par eman laayi hoon aur aap mujh se mohabbat karte hain to aap us ke dil ko narm kar dijiye aur mere Maula us ki hidayat ka faisla farma kar us ko yahan bhej dijiye, is ke baad tahajjud mein dua karti rahi, is Allah wali ka Allah ke saath Asmaa behn bohot naaz ka talluq tha, us ki duaen mere galey ka phanda ban gayi, teen din ke baad mere dil mein emaan jaane ka tawaqo paida hua, main apne teenon bachon ko chhod kar apne bhai ke saath wahan pahunchi. Mere shohar ki to mujh se milne ki himmat na hui, Ayesha mere paas aayi aur mujhe Islam qubool karne ko kaha aur mujhe samjhaya ke un ke saath yahin rahne ke liye ek hi raasta hai ke aap bhi musalman ho jaao aur musalman ho kar aap ka nikaah dobara un se hoga agar aap un ke saath musalman ho kar raho to main alag hone ko tayyar hoon, woh rokar mere paaon pakadti aur khushamad karti rahi, marne ke baad ke haalat aur jahannam ki baat karti rahi, us ki baat mere dil mein ghushti chali gayi yahan tak ke mere dil mein aaya ke main musalman ho jaoun, main ne musalman hone ko keh diya. woh mujh se chum kar khoob royi aur mere shohar ko phone karke bulaayi, ek aurat ko phone karke unke shohar Hafiz sahab ko bulaya, unhone do logon ko mazeed bulakar meher Fatimi par mera nikkah un se parhwadia. Woh apne kapray le kar mera ghar chhod kar chali gayi. Chand roz Fatima aapa jin ke yahan ijtima hota tha, un ke yahan rahi aur phir ek chhota makaan karaye par le liya. Ek hafta tak woh thore waqt ke liye mere yahan aati aur mujhe mubarak baad deti, meri bulaien leti aur kehti, Zainab tum kitni khush qismat ho ke Allah ne tum par kaisa reham kiya ke tumhein eman diya ab is eman ki qadar jab hogi jab tum us ko parhogi, woh ek aisi larki thi jawaab shayad jannat mein rehti thi, bas us ka jism dunya mein tha, magar us ka dil, dimagh aur soch sab jannat aur akhirat mein rehti thi, woh is dunya ko bilkul ek dhoka ghar, ek safar janti thi, us ki baaton mein aisi sachai aur mohabbat aur khuloos hota ke mujhe woh dunya mein apni sab se badi khairkhwa dikhayi dene lagi. Ek hafta ke baad ek roz mujh se kaha ke ab mein is ghar mein nahi aungi, ab aap kuch waqt ke liye mere kamre par aya karein mein un ke kamre jane lagi. Apne shohar se sare muqadme hum ne wapas le liye, mein daftar ke waqt mein kayi ghante us ke paas guzarti, us ne mujhe Quran Majeed parhaya aur urdu shuru karai, ek roz subah gyarah baje mein (Zainab) us (Ayesha) ke paas gayi, us ka chehra khushi se chamak raha tha, jumma ka din tha us ne kaha, ek khushi ki baat sunaoun, ab Allah se milne ke liye aur jannat mein jane ke liye mujhe intezar nahi karna pare ga, raat mein ne khwab dekha, hamare hazoor tashreef laye the aur mujh se farmaya: Ayesha yeh dunya to qaidkhana hai, tum kab tak yahan rahogi? Peer ke din hum tumhein jannat ke liye lene aayein ge. Yeh keh kar bohat hansi, bas teen roz aur hain Zainab, bas phir wo milein ge, bohat itminan se wahan maze mein sath rahin ge, mujhe bohat ajeeb sa laga, agle roz mein wahan gayi to wo kal ki tarah hush hash thi, mujhe parhaya aur mujh se kaha ke Allah ne hamein eman diya hai to ab hamein dosre logon ko eman ki dawat de kar dozakh ki aag se bachane ki koshish karni chahiye, itwaar ke roz mein wahan pohanchi to mein ne dekha wo chadar odhaye hue hai, mein ne kaha Ayesha aap ko kya hua? Unhone bataya ke mujhe subah se bukhar araha hai, mein us ko bohat zor de kar doctor ke yahan le gayi dawa dilwai aur kaha: kehna to mein ruk jaoon, ya phir aap hamare yahan hi chalien akele bukhar mein rehna theek nahi, wo boli momin akeela kahan hota hai aur yeh sher parha tum mere paas ho te ho jaise koi aur nahi hota jawaab: haan haan! jaise bhi ho, mein chali aayi, mein ne khwab dekha ke mein us ke paas ghar mein hoon, achanak ek bohat haseen khubsurat noorani shakal ke hazrat tashreef laye, hazrat Maulana Kaleem sahab bhi usi ghar mein hain, mujh se kaha yeh hamare rasool hain, Ayesha ko lene ke liye tashreef laye hain, us ke baad woh Ayesha ka haath pakar kar le gaye, meri aankh khuli to mujh par khwab ki khushi hone ke bajaye ke pehli martaba pyare Nabi ki ziyarat hui thi ajeeb sadma sa hua, raat ke teen baje rahe the mein ne uth kar tahajjud ki namaz parhi aur bohat roi, subah sawere mein Ayesha ke ghar pohanchi, bukhar us ko bohat zyada tha, mein ne pani ki patiyan us ke sar waghera par rakhi aur us se us ko raahat hui, mujh se kaha Zainab! Tumhari zindagi ko mein ne ajeeran kiya, mujhe maaf karna Khuda ke liye dil se maaf kardena, magar is mushkil ke baadiyah eman jo aap ko mila hai phir bhi bohat sasta sauda hai, bas meri aap se ek aakhri iltija hai ke teenon bachon ko aalim aur daa'i banana, yeh deen ka kaam karen ge to tumhare marne ke baad tumhare liye sawab ka kar khana laga rahe ga. Mein ne kuch kha ne ke liye kaha to unhone kaha ke doodh zara sa peeyongi, mere Nabi ne farmaya ke doodh acha rizq hai. peene aur khane donon kaam karta hai, mein ne doodh diya to garam tha, boli zara sa thanda kar do, zyada garam khane ki hadith mein mana'at aYe hai, doodh thanda karke diya, doodh piya kamzori barhti gayi, sardi mein dard ki shikayat ki, maine god mein sar rakh kar dabana shuru kiya, asr ke baad achanak kehne lagi, lo mere nabi to leen aagaye, zor zor se durood parhne lagi uthne ki koshish ki magar hilne ki himmat nah hui achanak kalma shahadat parha, do hichkiyan aayi aur inteqal hogaya. Sawal: Phir unke kafan dafn ka kya intezam hua? Jawab: Na jane kis tarah Fatima aapa gayin, bas unhone sab logon ko khabar kar di, na jane kaisi khushbu uske janaze se phoot rahi thi, ghar to ghar mohalla khushbu se mautr ho gaya, badi tadad mein logon ne janaze mein shirkat ki. Sawal: Aap ke shohar ka kya hua? Kya unhone ise talaaq de di thi? Jawab: Asal mein Ayesha mere shohar se israr karti thi ke Zainab ki khushi ke liye mujhe talaaq de do, magar unhone talaaq nahi di thi, inke inteqal ka un par bohat asar pada, unki zindagi bilkul khamosh hogayi. Sawal: Aur aap ko kaisa laga? Jawab: Yeh bilkul ajeeb o ghareeb ittefaq hai, sachi baat yeh hai ke ek aurat ke liye sokoon ka wajood sab se bara kanta hota hai, magar mere Allah jante hain yeh faisla karna mushkil hai ke Ayesha ke inteqal ka mujhe gham zyada hua ya mere shohar ko, bas main itna zaroor keh sakti hoon ke agar koi mujh se sau qasmein de kar yeh sawal kare ke duniya mein poori zindagi mein mujhe sab se zyada mohabbat kaun hai to main bina soche samjhe yeh kahungi meri sab se mohabbat aur khairkhah shakhsiyat Allah aur uske Rasool ke baad Ayesha marhooma hai, woh zameen par ek zinda wali thi, Isma behan! Sachi baat yeh hai ke main apne shohar par un haalat mein jis qadar roti thi, uss se sau guna zyada mujhe Ayesha ke inteqal ke sadme ne rolaya. Sawal: Aap ne apne bachon ki taleem kiya kya? Jawab: Main ne bachon ko school se utha liya, mere dono beton ka naam Hassan aur Hussain hai, in dono ko ek bade madrese mein dakhil kiya, Alhamdulillah Hassan ke 26 paray hifz hogaye hain, Hussain ke 4 paray hue hain aur Fatima beti bhi Alhamdulillah hifz kar rahi hai, uske 16 paray hifz hogaye hain, meri khwahish hai woh daai banain aur aalim deen ban kar Hazrat Khwaja Muinuddin Ajmeri ki tarah dawat ka kaam karein. Sawal: Aap ke shohar ka kya haal hai? Jawab: Unko Ayesha ke inteqal ka bara sadma hai, hamare paas rehne lage hain, baar baar kehte hain ab duniya se dil bhar gaya hai bas Allah ta'ala imaan par khatam karade, lekin jab zyada pareshan hote hain to main Maulana sahib ke paas unko bhej deti hoon woh kuch dawat par ubharte hain ab bhi unko le kar aayi hoon, Alhamdulillah iss martaba unhone hush hush rehne ka wada kiya hai. Sawal: Aap ke shohar abbi se milne aate rehte hain? Jawab: Woh abbi se bai'at hain, Ayesha bhi unse bai'at thi, aur main aur mere chhote bachay bhi Hazrat se bai'at hain, maine jab bai'at ke liye kaha tha to Hazrat ne bohat manaa kiya, unhone kaha bai'at to zaroor ho na chahiye magar kisi Allah wale aur kaamil sheikh se bai'at hona chahiye. Jism koY bimari mein jab insaan achay se achhay tabeeb ko talash karta hai to rooh ki bimari mein to aur bhi achhay se achhay sheikh kaamil ko talash karna chahiye, hazrat ne farmaya ke jo khud aakhri darja mein bimar ho woh kya kisi ka ilaaj kar sakta hai. Mein to apne sheikh ke hukm ki taameel mein tawbah kar leta hoon ke shayad sachay talib ki barkat se Allah Ta'ala mere gunah maaf farma de, mere shohar ne kaha hazrat humein aap ki barkat se Allah Ta'ala ne kufr o shirk ki bimari se nikaal liya aap ke ilawa humein kaun tabeeb milega, bohot israar karne par hazrat ne hum sab ko bay'at kar liya. Sawal: Bohat bohat shukriya Zainab Apa, waqai aap ki zindagi ek ajeeb zindagi hai. Jawab: Asmaa behan! Meri zindagi mein aur bhi ajeeb ajeeb waqiaat hain jin ko agar mein bata doon to ek lambi kitaab ban jaye gi magar is waqt hamari gaadi ka waqt qareeb hai, abhi bahar se baar baar taqaza aa raha hai, phir kisi waqt aakar saari kahani sunaungi. Sawal: Zaroor Zainab Apa, ab ki martaba aap chand roz ke liye aaiye phir hum kuch aurton ko ikattha karenge is waqt aap sunaiye ga. Jawab: Asmaa yeh nahi ho sakta, bas tumhein suna sakti hoon, aurton ke samne mein koi maulvi nahi hoon, mujhe to bohot raab hojata hai. Sawal: Achha theek hai, Allah hafiz! Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. Jawab: Wa alaikum assalam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh (Mastafad az Mahnama Armaghan, March 2009)